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Sick as a damned dog here. You know that cough that goes all the way down your trachea, through your lungs and pulls in air through your ass? Yeah, that one. The kids brought it home last week, wrapped it in ribbons, and gave it to me.

New book up top there, our best photos from the last year. Nice Xmas present for people who like to look at pretty things. Buy.

Girlchild’s 8th birthday party tomorrow (actual bday is the 4th). It was going to be a nice big party, with all her friends from school, at the local children’s museum. However, the school, with today’s bureaucratic/politically correct stick rammed firmly up their ass, has banned the passing out of invitations on school grounds. Girlchild, being the resourceful creature that she is, managed to smuggle several invites to her friends in between class and going home time. Between those and her soccer team, we might have eight kids in attendance. At a party planned for around 20. With a half-sheet cake that’ll feed between 20 and 40.

We’ll knock ourselves out, as usual, to make it a great day for her, and I’m sure she’ll enjoy herself even if only one friend shows up. But Monday I’m sending a nice thank you note to the school, only it won’t be nice, and it sure as fuck won’t say “thank you.”

Updated to add (extraordinary # of f-bombs imminent):

I would take it as great and personal favor, if all of you backwards motherfuckers would take the nearest rock, and smash your own fucking heads in. You haven’t the slightest fucking interest in joining the goddamned 21st century, and the rest of the fucking planet is Leaving You Behind. Trust me, if we had an actual global toilet bowl (you know, other than the one you’ve made of your entire fucking continent), we’d be more than happy to drop you right the fuck in the top turd. As it stands, however, you’re going to need to do that rock/head thing. NOW.

And a side note to Britain: STOP FUCKING SENDING PEOPLE TO THE GODDAMNED FUCKING-TOILET SUDAN. Oh, and thanks for wussing the fuck out when you had the chance to stranglefuck the entirety of Islam. Nice going.